I just...

I sit here,
Very sick.
Depriving my body of basic needs.
'Borderline pnemonia' says the
Physician. 'You could die if you don't gain weight'
But I don't look fragile,
I don't look thin...
Some say my face is sunken in,
But I feel...average.
The antibiotics won't work if I don't gain weight...
I lay in bed, supposed to be at work.
Fever of 101.
I just feel lost...
I just don't know...
I just...

Holding my phone,
I'm temped on many levels
Peaceful sounds could ring through...
But I close my eyes and let the dark consume me.